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Adapt

Published March 2, 2020 by helentastic67

Adapt

Being one handed, the most important thing I can recommend in order to survive is, learn to adapt.

It’s the day’s I go to the city and I do some hunter/gathering, that I push myself a little more and while it exhausts me, I notice how my physical body adapts.

My standard trips to the city meant a lot more steps and carrying. If I can’t carry it, I can’t buy it. So, I’ve gotten creative.

Yesterday, I bought two novels and a box of envelopes. Not heavy, just cumbersome and sharp corners. These day’s I travel with one of those fold up grandma bags. (Not a slur) but you can carry it around until you need it. It weighs nothing, takes up no space, but once it’s got two novels and inside it, I usually ask someone to help me put the handles on my left arm above where my cuff and collar sits, just on my elbow. The bag swings along my side and doesn’t hit my left thigh.

My next stop I collected comics, they are flat and not very heavy, so they go in my bag that sits on my right glutinous maximus. Slap, slap, slap.

Then I stopped at a chemist and picked up a few things. Definitely the weightiest purchases of the day. I might even have behind packaging to save or bulk. At this point I’ve reached my maximum density.

I’m starting to feel weighed down and I’m walking a little sideways and bumping into people. Or it could just be people on their devices not paying the least bit of attention to where they are.

After a quick pee break where the bag on my left arm stays there to save needing to put it back on. I walk not far to the tram or Bourke Street Mall and I get on the tram.


Waddling like a pregnant lady now, I try to get two seats near a door facing forward. I might start with one seat and the bag sits on my lap, the straps digging into my shoulders. My right leg in the isle making people brush against me. The bag on my left arm is beside me digging into whoever didn’t think to offer me both seats.


• I’ll just point out here I’m not bigger than Texas. I’m just a wide load by this stage.

Thirty-Five minutes later, I’m at my tram stop (Maybe I was able to spread out for the last 15-20 minutes) I stand up on the tram, readjust my bags, the strap on my left shoulder. I carry my walking stick with the wrist strap between my teeth, so it doesn’t bang all over every piece of metal known to man.


Have I mentioned, I can’t do stalker or stealth? I manoeuvre my way to a door, favouring my right side as that’s my better peripheral vision. All the better not to step on or bump into people and while holding on to one handle or another I manage to get to the right-hand door handle. Walking stick still in mouth.


Tram stops, door opens and I swing my left leg out and bending my right knee, step down. I don’t let go until both feet are on the ground. Hoping just hoping people have followed the road rules and cars have actually stopped at the back of the tram. Yeah! That does not always happen.

I then use my walking stick to walk to the curb. Right foot up, lift and swing left leg attempting left toes to clear the curb.


Fast forward to me getting inside my apartment. There have been days I’ve taken off the bags and weighed them and I’m surprised I’ve carried the extra five kilos home from the city.


But the biggest surprise to me is after I’ve unpacked everything and take my extra layers off (jacket, scarf, etc) I’m moving around my home feeling like I’m on a permanent tilt.


So, by gradually adding weight, my body compensates to do what I insist on it and when all of that is gone, my body still acts like it’s needing to adapt to carry the extra weight and that is today’s lesson.


You don’t know what you can do until you try. Do a little more on top of that and a migraine.

Today’s Lunch – 11th December 2019

Published December 11, 2019 by helentastic67

Today’s Lunch

Good Mental Health Day

Today, while still a classic mid-week foodie post I’m giving you a crash course in classic Melbourne weather, we are only 10 days into summer. Part of Australia is on fire! Sydney, is covered in smoke.

And on Monday, Melbourne had a hot day, close to 40 degrees. I was down in Collingwood for my osteo appointment and as we sat around complaining about the oven-like temperature an older gentleman informed us in no uncertain terms we were complaining too much and I quote: “It’s been summer for 6 hours and you are all acting like you are going to die!”  I agreed with him but told him tartly, “you make a fine point except for the fact that two weeks ago we had our second fake winter!”

I’ve been way too busy of late and with carers away on holidays, I’ve had many a call or text to negotiate last minute changes. It’s an ongoing saga. I refer to it as Putting out spitfires! Obviously, preferable to actual fires.

Last week, I had a migraine for days! As I ended up taking a tramadol! And Thursday my carer convinced me to go back to bed. She actually tucked me in. #love my carers

Today, I’m over in the west, in Footscray! (I refer to it as ‘scray!) As I’m at a meeting finishing this post.  Had a visit with Wilbur yesterday.

What? You can’t imagine I can multi-task one-handed? Have you met me? My names Helen! And today’s lunch is…………….some healthy fruit, beetroot dip & crackers.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Note; NO MEDICINE?!!!!!(coffee)

Today’s Lunch – 27th November 2019

Published November 27, 2019 by helentastic67

Today’s Lunch

Good Mental Health Day

Where were we? I had an appointment today with a follow-up at the sleep clinic. Yes! Yes! It’s still going on and I booked an appointment in my 2020 diary today for next September. Looks like I’m carrying around two diaries until January already! Too soon! Just too soon!


Last Thursday night I went to see the world release of film called Spirits in the forest. It was amazing!

https://www.orlandoweekly.com/Blogs/archives/2019/11/20/depeche-modes-spirits-in-the-forest-documents-their-world-tour-at-maitlands-enzian

Take the time to watch it. My favourite quote is when a fan describes seeing Depeche Mode in concert as the closest thing to going to church. My other favourite quote includes a crown and a cape and retiring g the someone. I was not the only person to laugh! They are definitely my favourite band despite the fact they have not toured in Australia since 1994, when I went to the after party and met the band! You heard me!

Here is a quick shout out to my friend William the owner of this vlog! I know not much about V8 Super car, but then I don’t need to? I know someone who does………..

www.williamsperfectride.com

And just before summer hits in Melbourne, these are my first Christmas Lillie’s out on my balcony.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I’m actually currently planning my Christmas at home in Melbourne rather than going to the country. To be continued on that front…….

But it really feels a calmer week this week so today’s lunch is a nice change, so today’s lunch is the Moroccan chicken salad with medicine!

Today’s Lunch – 20th November 2019

Published November 20, 2019 by helentastic67

Today’s Lunch

Good Mental Health Day

Happy hump day! It’s hot in Melbourne today! Have I ever mentioned how much I love hot weather? (Sarcasm) Yeah, that’s because I don’t! And I’m out in it……all day!

Even though my AVM (Artereovenous Malformation) has been fried with radiation so it’s not at risk of a bleed, a stroke or even blood flow but in hot weather my brain is not happy. My left side of my body works even worse than normal. So, my AFO and Shoe wears not quite right. My body compensates by just pushing through and smashing it out. I still have all the same deadlines. The same appointments to get to. At least once home I have air-conditioning and cold water in the fridge. Once home the cool change will throw my brain into a brain freeze. I predict a kip until my brain and body normalises. Welcome to my summer!

Meanwhile, luckily as I was here yesterday, much cooler. I had yummy sausage roll with relish and a side salad and medicine and macaron. Everything else had sold out!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Meanwhile, today’s lunch consisted of…….the brain grain salad. And medicine.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Glad I’m at home for the most part tomorrow for an even hotter day!

Meanwhile my Egg-Dealer is back from his holiday in Queensland! Putting in a huge order. Hoping the eggs don’t fry in my apartment or hatch! Got a mental image of little chicks chasing Mika! “Muma? Muma?” To cement the image, I’m ordering 140 eggs! Poor Mika!

Clayton’s Holiday

Published September 23, 2019 by helentastic67

Clayton’s Holidays

There was a drink back in the 80’s and I has become part of Aussie Pop Culture references that crosses all things. The ad was for a drink (beverage) called Claytons.

It refers to it being the drink when you don’t feel like having a drink. A drink without being alcoholic. So, this is a post about a Clayton’s holiday. Get it?

About five years ago, I was with an agency that arranged holidays (group holidays) for their clients. I was able to and included on two holidays, which was really nice as I think it’s been about ten years since I actually had a holiday and even then, that was to Tasmania for two-three nights.

So, the group holidays work out to be only a half day drive from Melbourne and only away over night or two. The other client’s range in age from five (one client’s daughter) to sixty-five (maybe). There were two mini buses with wheelchair lifts on the back (two wheelchairs in the back of each) and usually a car.

I usually bags the front seat of the mini bus (I will do a polishing motion on my backside and one of the carers will effortlessly lift me and deposit me in my seat). Yeah, I do that sexual harassment for the ladies. But I won’t allow a male carer to man-handle the goods. (I’m not light these days, but one lady just effortlessly lifted me making me feel so light.)

Being on a little get away with a bunch of strangers and three or four carers means you have a polite but temporary family type experience.

I always pitch in to help prep a salad or something in the evening as we usually stay somewhere we have a shared meal where ever we stay on the first night, as most meals are eaten out.

The first holiday I went to we stopped on the way back to Melbourne at an outer Melbourne suburb for a lunch and a little adventure.

A friend lived there, so I suggested they join me, so I could catch up with them. Said friend had recently been diagnosed with something quite nasty. They are still in that honeymoon stage of diagnosis where they have had the sugar-coated version of their diagnosis. Goes something like this “OH, you only have 3 lesions…”

Note, privacy being maintained here, yeah. This medical condition is such that when people hear I have a brain injury, I tell them, “Hey! It’s okay, this is my bottom line right now. At least I don’t have XYZ.” Because XYZ is degenerative. It gets worse. It gets shitty. I just gets’ worse.

So, this friend joined my little group of holiday buddies and I briefly introduced them to the group. I’m going to say, I’m terrible with names and I’ve been around this group of people with disabilities now a few years, so in a little desensitized re: medical conditions.

My introduction went like this;

“Brain Injury, MS, Stroke, Stroke, Oxygen deprived at birth (Brain Injury) etc, etc”. And I finished with referring to one particular person in a wheelchair (of which there were five) but the last person I pointed to had the XYZ my non-holiday friend has. “That will be you one day” and they paled considerably.

To be continued

Today’s Lunch – 11th September 2019

Published September 11, 2019 by helentastic67

Today’s Lunch

Good Mental Health Day

Another mid-week post, it’s not getting old. Good food, better medicine. My favourite cafe never gets old. What gets old is doing adult so much it’s squeezing time to eat and write into oblivion. Note, the less lunch my lunch resembles and more like afternoon tea.

Yesterday, was at the self-advocacy group I attend. Picked up some comedy tickets for next March! Yippy! Stay tuned for that!

Here is a photo of what’s referred to as the witches’ hat in the Arts Precinct in Melbourne.

Note the beautiful spring day in Melbourne.

Today’s offering is Carrot cake and medicine (One of my serves of vegetables every day!) and the pretty strawberry daiquiri my lovely assistant is having.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And blessed Young John, my taxi driver has returned from Greece, have so missed him.

 

Dreams

Published July 8, 2019 by helentastic67

Dreams

I had a dream yesterday; well I dream a lot. But mostly I have weird dreams where 3 or 4 crazy things are smashed into.

I dream, it usually includes house that are apparently my home, there is definitely a feeling of this is my home to it, but they are places I don’t recognise, in area’s that remind me of the 90’s, my earlier days but yet not in areas I would live in now.

At such times the details are insane, a door handle that isn’t working properly, reminds me of houses I have lived in. Opening a door to the outside and seeing an abundance of plants hanging from the eaves with bright red tomatoes in abundance. Then my sister is there. Well, either of my sisters would be strange.

The other times I’M ON ROLLER SKATES. Anyone else having these dreams? Yeah, I did roller skate when I was a kid and I’ve a friend who does Roller Derby.

But my dream, I was roller skating around the city, around Federation Square and I had some speed, was cutting in and around people and not hitting anybody and still managing to stay upright.

HOW? I don’t know…

Then I got to the top of some stairs and I just flew down them, my wheels catching the platform in between the second drop of stairs and still UPRIGHT. People cheered!

I guess I am not prepared to try roller skating as I imagine I don’t need scrapes and wounds to add to my drama. But it was a nice dream with a feeling of freedom, success and achievement.

 

Today’s Lunch – 29th May 2019

Published May 29, 2019 by helentastic67

Today’s Lunch

Good Mental Health Day

First I really need everyone to know winter has arrived to Melbourne. Officially a few days away still but have already unpacked my woollens and jackets! Mika is already loving sleeping on the polar fleece blanket but still yet to work out the benefits to being a lap cat. Sadly……….. She has started being less fussy about what she will eat or not. FYI: I got lucky with my fur baby, Mika. She is not food motivated! So, I have worked hard in the last 7 months to put some condition on her.

Also, heard news one of parcels was received in Norfolk, UK. Here’s a link……

https://oscardandelion.wordpress.com/2019/05/23/thank-you-helen/

Yesterday, I went to the cinema! I went to see John Wick Parabellum! Mmmmmmm, Keanu! (Sorry) the consensus might be that I am a little immune to unnecessary violence. My friend would likely count the rounds used (as in bullets) I would count the number of bodies. And I suggested the headcount first.

Should mention the hilarity of accidentally going into the incorrect cinema first. Saw five minutes of the new Rebel Wilson film The Hustle. Definitely need to see that next. I don’t get to the cinema much but when I do it’s totally worth it. I want one of those armchairs, it’s was amazing I nearly fell asleep I was so comfortable, just need a pillow and doona. (It’s like a blanket)

So, because I again have had to reschedule my dinner out with friends, third week in a row, I’ve decided to have some winter stodge for lunch! Today’s offering a Zaffarino Arancini with a side salad & my medicine

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And for the very last item on my agenda? I finished Game of Thrones (G.O.T.) on the weekend! No spoilers. But done.

Today’s Lunch – 8th May 2019

Published May 8, 2019 by helentastic67

Today’s Lunch

Good Mental Health Day

Was in the city yesterday and as I got off the train at Flinders Street station the announcement came over the loudspeaker, “Welcome to Flinders Street station, it’s currently 14 degrees in Melbourne.” and my internal commentary replied “Yes, it is!”

I’m considering my full-length pants already, which is my winter option and it also means no pocket! I miss having pockets!

Need some more calm today, to catch up on some writing. and eating so today’s offering is an Ortolani quiche with a side salad and medicine.

I’m also commiserating I didn’t get into a short course I had applied for that would make me eligible to sit on a board. There were 2000 positions that exist in the corporate sector that could have the potential of me taking the next step toward advocating for people with disabilities. Otherwise, I shall have to keep blogging my brains out. Fine! I can do that too.

Also, I know others have more however! I now have 236 followers, still growing and working out how to get more likes and comments/feedback without selling out. Feeling needy but only because I too have needs.

Cheers

H

Career – Part 1

Published April 26, 2019 by helentastic67

 

Career

It’s such a weird word isn’t it? Today, I thought I’d cover a little of my work history, sort of.

I grew up living in the country, I didn’t grow up on a farm, I was considered a “Townie”.

By the time I was sixteen, I was a full-time student, a part time check-out chick and a “when ever babysitter” I’m not complaining. It was what it was. But I had NO SOCIAL LIFE. None, Zero.

Over Christmas, I picked up seasonal work on a blueberry farm. So, don’t talk to me about blueberries. I don’t get it. You are on your own.

I only picked when there was no work in the shed packing. Let me tell you the difference. While picking, my older sister would give a decent rendition of “I found my thrills on Blueberry Hills”. Good times. But it was hard going.

Packing, while arduous, we started at 6am and went hard until 4pm.There were no guys in the packing shed. It was considered that men distracted the women in the sorting shed. So the “no”is important? Sounds so 1950’s, or is it just me? There was the constant smell of bleach from the cleaning products. It paid better, but was stressful. The best berries went to export somewhere like Germany and at the end of the season we sorted all the berries that was deemed too small, mangled or mouldy out so, it could go to be made into pies or jam. You’re welcome.

Even when I did that job from 6am until 4pm, I would go home, shower, eat something and go to my supermarket job from 5pm to 9pm.

Good thing I was planning to be a poor art student. My two days of cherry picking marred by heatstroke and sleeping under the tree on a bull-ant nest, just because I picked the wrong side of the tree first. What? You heard. There is a right and wrong side of a tree. Yes! You pick the side first that doesn’t get the morning sun, then in the afternoon you pick the side that had the morning sun.

So, while I stayed living in the country another year after completing high school because I didn’t get into what I wanted to go on and do, I got into TAFE art course for a year. It was fairly stock standard course to go do and build on a folio if you didn’t get a course in the city.

I was still doing the full-time study, part-time work and xyz babysitter. Still no social life.

When I moved to Melbourne, it took a little while, but I was eventually introduced to really cool night clubs. Night clubs became my social life.

The first clubs I was introduced to were full on “WOG” clubs (again, don’t take offense, my father is Italian, so I can use that term) Lebanese, Turks, mention of history of guns blazing and drive by’s at the first club I went to Brunswick back in the early 90’s. Also, where I heard the fantastic piece by O’Fortuna in Apotheosis. I think I went out and bought the last twelve-inch vinyl copy to come into the country. Because it heavily sampled them from a well-known classical piece of music, it was banned.

The vibe in the clubs was electric, but then there was some really shifty stuff about wog clubs. The continuous stream of standing around the outside of the dance floor and girls dragging their boyfriends behind them, who would seem, lean in for a cheeky snog.

What! Yes! Outrage!

A guy that was with the people I was with pinched me on the backside so I turned and delivered him a slap. His sister and two friends came up to me all gangster-bitch like to take a piece of me. “I know he’s an asshole, but he’s my brother” so much for sisterhood.

The following week, a friend of his came up to me and told me the “pincher” wanted to buy me a drink, maybe he should have started with that.

I don’t know why I’m still single, but I don’t think it’s because I’m prepared to slap men if they deserve it. My ass was offended.

But that is to say, I digress.

While I studied to be a Visual Merchandiser, that being shop front window displays, shop layouts etc. I didn’t get into that, I didn’t have a folio, I couldn’t drive (to do freelancing) and I wasn’t a guy and gay. So, I couldn’t get a job with Myers.

I know, What? Those gay bitches get everything, so, I had started giving out some passes for the first club I worked for.

When I finished my course and disillusioned about what I really wanted to be doing for the rest of my life. Yeah, like that’s realistic to imagine someone of my age staying in the same job/company/industry for all of my working career.

To be continued…

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